BIRTHING VIOLET by Ella Wilson
My mother had died six months earlier as I lay on my bed in Brooklyn and began to time my contractions.
I had never needed her more than during my labor. I wanted living proof that this was possible. I didn’t believe I held enough power or knowledge, enough female strength to do this alone. But she had gone, so I had hired a mother, a doula, to be my guide.
My doula, Mary-Esther Malloy, arrived at three in the morning while I was in the shower. I had taken natural birth classes with her, determined to recreate my late mother’s labor. Continue reading
When asked about the moment she first saw her son as he rested below her, Amy said: The folks who were there noticed that Miles really took everyone in and “arrived,” so to speak, in that moment. It was great, and I was really happy to have that time to catch my breath. Telling him he was welcome was really beautiful too, I think I was crying. It was so moving!
On November 4th, 2010, I met my third child in what I can only describe as the most ecstatic of ways. After an unexpectedly long first stage and a shockingly speedy second stage, I birthed my baby on my bed in the all fours position. As my midwife guided my baby down below me, I was thrilled to finish a labor that had seemed to last an eternity. But it is the next moments that are forever seared in my memory. As I saw my daughter below me… as I touched her meaty little arms and legs, took in her strawberry hair, watched her first breaths, felt her cord pulsing with the life force we had shared for so long, and finally – when I had really SEEN her- picked her up, the experience was nothing less than euphoric. I knew from watching others that not hurrying a baby onto its mother’s chest left the moment open to be what it needed to be. But I had no idea that being upright for this precious first meeting … with my daughter below me… no one hurrying her or me … would feel so powerful. I don’t think I have ever looked so hard at another human. I feel that I now understand in a visceral way what we mean when we talk about the imprinting that takes place at birth. It was an extraordinary gift to be able to truly see and take in this brand new person in the moments in which she arrived.